94 Comments
User's avatar
Swabbie Robbie's avatar

Platitudes are so old school. We now use paddleitudes to voice our opinions. Works with ping pong diplomacy too.

Expand full comment
Micheal Nash, Ph. D.'s avatar

Platitude makes me me think of platypus which then reminds me of the 2 kids talking about the most dangerous animals until one mentioned the nemrod. The what is that question answered by saying a nasty cave dweller with teeth at both ends. How, they asked, does it go to the bathroom? It doesn't...that is why it is so mean. Perhaps an explanation for those paddle bearing dems?

Expand full comment
la chevalerie vit's avatar

Trump Constipation Syndrome, when TDS manifests physically.

Expand full comment
Ana González's avatar

That makes sense 🤔.

They have nothing to contribute!?!?

Expand full comment
James Lord's avatar

They tried to put their spin on it, but got hit with a return smash.

Expand full comment
JoanBalone's avatar

lol! Great take on our paddle pushers!

Expand full comment
Ned B.'s avatar

I guess the Democrats did not want to go up shit creek without a paddle.

Expand full comment
Catherine Cummings's avatar

Good one.

Expand full comment
Ana González's avatar

Yep!!! Lol 😆 🤣 😂

Expand full comment
Patricia's avatar

Oh yeah, that makes sense!!! Bawa-Bawa……so funny!

Expand full comment
Karen Baetz's avatar

The dynamite and the jeep Cherokee both made me laugh out loud!

Expand full comment
Nancy Benedict's avatar

Same here. And elderly JD.

Expand full comment
Lonnie Bedell's avatar

Hey...it takes time to paint all those bricks with gold paint.

Expand full comment
Alan Davis (FlyoverAlinCT)'s avatar

“I apologize Goldfinger. It’s an inspired deal”.

Expand full comment
Wilma's avatar

I heard that Ian Fleming wrote the Bond books as a warning....

Expand full comment
carol pawluk's avatar

I would want to know how genuine the shakes are. Are they made with sham rocks or with real rocks?

Expand full comment
Garfield's avatar

I was once at dinner with a friend and our waitress asked him if he wanted coffee with dessert. He asked "is it instant". She had the blank state for just a second or two and then said "no, but I'm pretty fast".

Expand full comment
Michael Williams's avatar

Harvard and pigeons would've been one of the best events of the decade if true 😂

Expand full comment
James Lord's avatar

"We've just sucked one hour of your life away. Tell me... How do you feel?"

Well, Christopher Guest, like you took 10, and made it 11.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4xgx4k83zzc

This is how old I am: I remember when Rob Reiner was funny.

Expand full comment
Swabbie Robbie's avatar

I think as he aged he got stuck in the meathead character

Expand full comment
Joseph Kaplan's avatar

Only because of Archie bunker

Expand full comment
Micheal Nash, Ph. D.'s avatar

The dem women having a pinko event is hardly news, is it.

Expand full comment
Ana González's avatar

Rambler, it just displays how much thought 🤔 goes into their antics?!?!

Expand full comment
Patricia's avatar

Great Sunday Strip funnies! The DOGE statement rings true; so many complaints & consistent whining from the “Deep State”, yet I haven’t heard anything from Schumer or Warren- YET-, about their alleged projects they may have going on?

Expand full comment
Swabbie Robbie's avatar

Could they lose their jobs for not answering the 5 things they accomplished last week? Please?!

Expand full comment
Patricia's avatar

I would hope so! Maybe get voted out on next term elections maybe? Would be great to see that happen, & the deep state, leftist lunatics “be gone”!

Expand full comment
Susanne's avatar

Their brains are dead because they haven't worked in so long and boosters, DTS sleeplessness, and their cabbage king is gone. While the actual King OZ behind closed curtains is colluding with China, etc asking what the next step could be.

Expand full comment
D D's avatar
Mar 9Edited

Serious question about "daylight savings time". I start adjusting my cat's feeding schedule days in advance, medication timing is all over the place. What do hospitals do to handle the care of patients who are on a tight timing with meds. and procedures? I usually only think of my own inconvenience while resetting every clock in the house as well as the Grandmother clock. Why doesn't this time change get stabilized after the studies show the detriment to our health? AARGH

Expand full comment
LB (Little Birdie)'s avatar

If they would just let us 'folks' vote on it, it would be a done deal😤 ‼️

Should the U.S. stop changing clocks twice a year for daylight saving time?

Yes, leave it standard time all year (earlier sunrises, sunsets) 99.23% (392,402 votes)

Expand full comment
Garfield's avatar

Add one more.

Expand full comment
Ana González's avatar

Absolutely 💯 %!

I'm done with #FakeTime!!!!

Expand full comment
Randall Stoehr's avatar

Because Time is money.

Ask any Politician, they'll say but it's a secret.

And these folks think Gold is money too.

Expand full comment
James Lord's avatar

Joe Biden had 100 million chickens killed.

Interesting piece of history: The Ware Group. I learned about them several years ago reading a biography of Alger Hiss.

"The Ware group started among young lawyers and economists hired by the Agricultural Adjustment Administration (AAA). This New Deal agency reported to the Secretary of Agriculture but was operated independently of Department of Agriculture bureaucracy. All the members of the Ware Group were dues paying members of the Communist Party."

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ware_Group

Expand full comment
Thomas from Iowa's avatar

The more things change the more they stay the same, they just repackage and relabel the failed policies like the Green New Deal. Thanks for the reference to the Ware group, the same old enemies within.

Expand full comment
Tom Daniel's avatar

Biography of Alger Hiss??!!

Alger Hiss was an American Communist traitor embedded in the U.S. State Department who in the middle of WWII - at the behest of FDR - ginned up the charter for the United Nations (which he gave the Soviet Union TWO votes in the so-called "Security Council"); Hiss was the 1st Secretary of the U.N. at its 1st meeting in San Francisco after WWII ended; was finally outed, tried and charged as being a Russian spy and spent a short time in a federal prison. End of story.

Expand full comment
James Lord's avatar

Convicted of perjury, but you're mostly right. Thus the title: "Alger Hiss: Why He Chose Treason." By Christina Shelton.

Expand full comment
Tom Daniel's avatar

Had it not been for Whittaker Chambers renouncing his own membership in the CPUSA - and fingering Hess, who knows how much more damage he could - and would - have done to our Republic. The "American" communists - the REDS - continued to claim Hess was innocent - the MO of the treasonous rats.

Expand full comment
Tom Daniel's avatar

BTW, James, what was Hess' excuse for becoming an American Communist?

Expand full comment
James Lord's avatar

He maintained his innocence of the accusations (of being a spy) until he died. But Shelton makes a compelling case that he lived a lie, and rolls out the evidence.

Cracking the book open again to the book's epilogue, I read this from the author: "Alger Hiss fastened upon an illusory ideology claiming to answer all questions, promising utopia, but in reality concealing tyranny. In the process he betrayed his country. Dedicated by oath and office to serving his country, he became a secret agent of the adversary, the Soviet intelligence apparatus. He had closed his mind, blind to the inhumanity of Communism, and adopted Lenin's notion that the choice of revolution is ultimate and irrevocable, an act of passion as well as intellect. Hiss worked hard to appear urbane and sophisticated and behind this persona was his single-minded devotion to Communism, leading to a lifetime of defiance and denying any wrongdoing."

PS: I found the book worthwhile.

Expand full comment
Tom Daniel's avatar

The author - Christina Shelton - nails Hiss to his Hammer & Sickle.

What amazes is WHY so many so-called "intellectuals"- world wide - STILL

fall for the absolute gibberish of Karl Marx "thought" and the imbecility of

and impossibility of "continuous revolution" until "absolute equality" in a far off utopia is achieved - and the Communist State THEN "fades away". HAH!

Marx apparently had NO comprehension of the inbred fault in the DNA of the Homo-sapiens species that lusts for POWER and CONTROL over others.

World history is replete with examples of both sexes of power-mad-control-freaks who directly caused only bloody chaos to the human condition.

Expand full comment
Ana González's avatar

James, I seem to remember that there were also several chicken farms that were destroyed by fire.

I'm not sure since the pace of news now days is like drinking water 🚰 from a fire hose!!!🤷🏻‍♂️🤷🤷‍♀️

🤔

Expand full comment
Barbara Lekowicz's avatar

Wheeeee! My Sunday Funnies are here and what a delight! I can't thank you enough, Drs Malone for your weekly contribution to my happiness with your Funnies on Friday and Sunday! I hope your broken bones are healing and you are taking it easy for a bit. What? Dr. Malone slowing down? Well. a gal can hope - at least until you heal. Take care!

Expand full comment
Nealstar's avatar

"Assembry" is a Japanese word, while "Flied Lice" is Chinese. Also FWIW: there is a Japanese city named, "Usa", which is a city in Ōita Prefecture, Japan so they used to be able to say "Made in USA".

No "l's" in Japanese and no "r's" in Chinese.

Yeah, I know, there's one in every crowd. Sorry.

Expand full comment
Tom Daniel's avatar

Deep State operative - Samantha Power - former O'butthead's Ambassador to the U.N. (at which time she illegally "Outed" over 100 American citizens during the Russiagate fiasco); then became Obiden's choice for Director of USAID, pulling down around 400K per year.

Hopefully, Pam Bondi will (soon) meter out justice to Power for her part in providing billions - yes, BILLIONS of US taxpayer $$$$$$$$$$$ to bogus "non-governmental organizations" world-wide!

Expand full comment
la chevalerie vit's avatar

Vance/‘36 - Sounds great but let’s not count our chickens before they’re culled.

Expand full comment
VictorDianne Watson's avatar

Memes are great! Obviously, the Democrats have nothing to add to the narrative, so they might as well shut down MSNBC, CNN, NBC, ABC and CBS. Not many would notice!

Expand full comment